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Yeah, that in-between phase after stopping meds can feel like walking a tightrope with no net. One thing that’s helped me feel more grounded is looking into treatments that don’t just numb things but actually try to rebalance what’s off. I’ve been trying https://releaf.co.uk/. Only mentioning it because it genuinely helped take the edge off for me when nothing else really clicked. Just in case you’re still exploring options
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In reply to Post #19
I asked for counselling before my former works offered it to me as i knew the day would eventually come as I’d been off for so long (around 8-10 months) and I’m pleased I did as I felt needed confirmation that it was because of the company and not my doing as to why I was feeling the way I did. The relief felt when I heard my counsellor say that you knew exactly what you had wanted from these sessions and that you knew all along the reasons for my anxieties and depression. I tried start back work but they (within employment law) knew how to make things difficult for me which in itself is a long story. Knew instantly that I had to get out and the union had asked for a pay off (think it was classed as severance) for the 10 years service I had given which was equivalent in today’s money to around 3K.
The reason I came to work for this company was because they had won the tender from the local council as they had put in the lowest price to run it for 5 years. Fortunately I had terms under previous employment(TUPE) in which it means that my bonuses and rate of pay were protected and could not be only be not taken away but improved upon should they increase their bonuses to their own staff.
I was seen as someone that they would love to replace in order to bring in their own members of staff at a lower rate of those that had (TUPE). When new workers arrived it wasn’t long before folk began to become restless which as you could imagine it didn’t exactly set the scene for a happy environment.
Had a great pension too where the original company I worked for put in 3 times more each month than what I was paying. This wasn’t TUPE’d over but nevertheless that didn’t prevent them from making my time there as difficult as can be and yet within the eyes of the law.
Sorry for going off a little but if there is one person out there that has had similar experience/s then don’t for one moment blame yourself,
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In reply to Post #43
There are different stages of depression, and some of the stages can be treated by yourself, especially if you have a good friend. If you are severely depressed, however, it is impossible to cure it without a doctor's intervention. Recently my friend's parents died, and of course, he got depressed because of that. He was drinking a lot of alcohol so he wouldn't feel any pain. I decided to help him; I learned everything about treating depression on the Internet. It is impossible to get rid of depression in a moment; it is a long process requiring a lot of effort.
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In reply to Post #42
Ufortunately, people not always understand what is depression. They think that it's the feeling of tiredness. Depression is much more complex and deeper problem and, as you've mentioned, it should be treated with the help of specialists.
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In reply to Post #41
I happened to work like 2/2 on 12 hours day/night shifts and during my weekends I had another job. It lasted for a year and a half. This led to burnout and depression which thankfully I managed to get through with the help of a specialist.
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In reply to Post #36
Citalopram is an SSRI I've been on a few and found that my anxiety manifested itself more as frustration / anger / aggression. its interesting to hear your experience.
I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety relating to my autism and childhood trauma, the fact they linked it to my autism ( life long incurable disorder ) made me feel helpless as I thought they'd just stick with me like it, and so I spent a long time not even trying to fight them. alcohol, drugs, absolutely nothing would numb the emotion pains I felt, in the end I just let it consume me and existed in a purgatorial state of rock bottom emotions, it was easier for it to be constant than fluctuate and this made me back away from virtually any positive thought process. made more than one attempt to end my own life.
Every day I say my thanks that My Family stood by me in those days, especially a West Highland Terrier very dear to me but sadly now passed on.
I was ripped out of the constant low moods but learnt to live with depression, and manage anxiety. I also learnt not to categorise any sadness I felt as depression, as depression isn't an emotion its an emotional illness. I discovered it was ok to get hurt, to need to grieve, to feel anguish but that I also wasn't worthless and had the right to feel pride, a sense of achievement and occasionally joy.
I still have a lot of horrendous days, they probably still outnumber the good but for me, but the bad days end. the next day might be bad but the previous day doesn't oblige me to carry that weight forward. I feel lucky ot realise this.
I hope you all have some peace
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In my case when I was working at the company I’ve since finished at then I’d say anxiety of going into work certainly caused the depression. Even when I’d have a week annual leave the most upper thing in my mind was thinking of when I return, which in turn brought on the depression.
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In reply to Post #34
I plonked myself onto Citalopram and if anything it only made my brain process Anxiety differently instead of getting rid of it entirely. It's hard to explain, but instead of my body having just mental fog with that gut churning fear and recurring negative thoughts of "what ifs", it turned my anxiety into a brief feeling of physical anguish rather than longer more intense feelings of dread and sadness.
As above posts, a lot of it is dealing with the source rather than the symptom. I had to deal with the fact I had not allowed myself to process a lot of what I had seen and experienced over a five year period because you don't want to be seen as "weak" by your peers.
Setting small daily achievable goals is a good start on that path. If your path to a better state of mind is to change jobs, spend more time with your family and to feel and look better, then the best way probably isn't to spunk thousands on a college course to be a sparky, book a holiday to spain and join a gym all within the first few days. Just editing your CV, taking the kids to the park and going for a walk is a good start. Failing/hitting barriers will only compound the negative thoughts you may have.
In my experience, the worst thing you can do whilst already depressed is embark on a river campaign then lose the only carp in that stretch within half an hour of turning up  . Get a float rod out and bang out some silvers. It's amazing how a waggler makes you forget the outside world...
Best wishes sir.
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In reply to Post #8
Anxiety is a completely different thing to depression, I was the same, worried about anything and everything andf would tie myself up in knots.
I was given anti depressants and they helped a little, spoke to another doctor about upping my dose as I still wasn't right and he suggested propanalol which is usually used for high blood pressure. What an absolute game changer!!!
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In reply to Post #30
 
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In reply to Post #30
Just more of the nonsense posts that seem to have links added a week later (like the one in the listening thread)
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In reply to Post #29
Simple I made a mistake. You're were right all along.
But it's easy to own up to a mistake, you never know maybe the rest of the forum might catch on 
Now you've got me wondering, why were the posts removed.
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In reply to Post #28
Oh yes, so they have......
Get out of this one.....lol.
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In reply to Post #26
Don't know what school you attended but post 23 and 24 have gone
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In reply to Post #26
There is mate because one poster replied to me by stating ‘that’s not strictly true’. After asking what isn’t true i then looked to see if he had replied only to notice both mine and his had gone.
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NON Carp stuff