A source has just told me,that Odemwingie has just arrived at the Vatican...

In reply to Post #1088

In reply to Post #1090
Findus to sponsor Crystal Palace as they have been 100% pony for over 50 years...........

She didn't try to hide her disappointment when she pulled my cock out.

"You fcuking liar!" She said, "You told me it was 12 inches."

"It is," I insisted, "You just need to calculate the volume."

In reply to Post #1082

In reply to Post #1084

In reply to Post #1085

In reply to Post #1088

B&Q have know been dragged into the food scandal, apparently they have been selling wood floors with lamb in it.

The Mexican maid asked for a pay increase.

The wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise.

She asked, Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?

Maria: Well, Senora, there are tree reasons why I wanna increaze. The first is that I iron better

Than you.

Wife: Who said you iron better than me?

Maria: Jor huzban he say so.

Wife: Oh yeah?

Maria: The second reason eez that I am a better cook than you.

Wife: Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?

Maria: Jor hozban didâ

Wife increasingly agitated: Oh he did, did he?

Maria: The third reason is that I am better at sex than you in the bed.

Wife, really boiling now and through gritted teeth asks, And did my husband say that as well?

Maria: No Senora¦ The gardener did.

Wife: So how much do you want?

My son looked upset today so I asked him what was wrong.

He sat down on the sofa beside me and said, "Can I talk to you about having sex with my girlfriend?"

"Of course," I replied.

He said, "Can you stop doing it please

In reply to Post #1099

"G'day mate, Fosters help line. What's the problem dude?".

"I'm in Australia with the girlfriend and she's been stung on the vagina by a Hornet, and now her v@gina has completely closed up".

"Bummer dude".

"Thanks mate, bye."

In reply to Post #1101
been flyed that

In reply to Post #1101