 Fishing & Mental Health
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In reply to Post #29
(replying to 27, not 29!)
It's called "hyper focus". It's great for some things (son has diagnosed ADHD and is doing his doctorate as a research scientist, which it's a perfect fit for!) but it means I can obsess about things that don't really matter. Still fixating on things that happened 20 years ago for example! For anyone that has, thinks they have, or lives with people with ADHD/AUDHD/OCD the "I'm ADHD, No you're not" podcast by Paul Whitehouse and his partner, Dr Mine Conkbayir (it's the other way round really, she's the expert!) is really good to get different peoples take on it, especially as she's diagnosed, but against medicating. Love her or hate her, Katie Prices was a really good listen.
Re: depression - I tapered off Citalopram as i hated the way it made me feel. No highs, no lows - everything was grey. But I know the signs now and how to manage it. Most of the time....
One problem I have with fishing as a cure is I find it gives me too much time to think, which can then lead to brooding on stuff. Should find an easier syndicate! I also do long (50 mile+) bike rides which I find I don't think as much as I'm usually trying not to puke 😂
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Been on Citalopram for a good few years now. I'd probably be 6 foot under by now if i hadnt of started taking it. Anxiety, stress, anger, OCD, depression, agrophobia to name but a few issues i had to deal with and also since covid, COPD. I still have the odd blip but far easier to deal with nowadays.
Friends often tell me i should do this and do that but they really have no idea what goes on in someones mind who is suffering mental health issues and you might as well try and nail jelly to the ceiling than try to explain. I just tell them to let me deal with it in my way, which usually just involves a few days on the bank.
Retail therapy helps as well 😉
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In reply to Post #40
The way you explain yours isn’t what she’s saying she uses it as an excuse or blames her mom(my partner’s) health issues for not going to work,yet when weekends comes or someone asks her to go out somewhere she jumps up and goes so yeah she’s just lazy she’s in a big rut,she sleeps till late then moans she’s tired and needs to sleep again and does nothing round the house,last week she finally went to work my missus works 2 jobs to keep her house and her daughter made a promise she’d be paying half when they moved but I’ve had to help my partner at times due to her being in and out of hospital.
She needed a massive kick up backside to go to work she didn’t even realise you need to pay for hot water unbelievably naive too much attention to her phone and other stuff she hasn’t got anxiety,depression or MH she’s just lazy.
Hopefully she now realises she needs to work to buy stuff and help her mom
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In reply to Post #39
Anxiety is an absolute beast of a mental issue, it can literally be crippling.
My symptoms have varied over the years but can be anything from profusely sweating, retching till it made me sick, constantly running nose. Most recent one is coughing.
Telling someone who is genuinely suffering from anxiety to step us is like telling someone with depression to snap out of it or cheer up.
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My partner’s youngest (22)been off work sick trying to say it’s anxiety and MH since December,we just think personally it’s just lazyiness in her,nothing wrong at all with her I think her dad who’s on pip had encouraged her to do it rather than reeling her to step up basically
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In reply to Post #36
I think once you actually understand what's happening and it's not anything you've actually done yourself it makes it a lot easier to speak about it.
Quite simply put, you're just wired a bit differently. I actually joke now about how much of a car crash my life is.
Walked up 3 flights of stairs to get my wallet, noticed the room needed tidying, spent 20 minutes tidying it. Left my wallet upstairs.
Mental health takes so many different forms, some people it may be triggered by something, some people it's a chemical imbalance.
What I would say is if someone wants to talk to you my best advice is just listen, don't try to make it better, don't try to compare as all they want to do at that point is decompress.
My inbox is always open
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In reply to Post #35
Thanks mate
I went back to work too early but I’d rather be doing something than sitting at home dwelling on it I do have flash backs and what if’s I know I saved her for her to go in hospital but I think 5 minutes earlier and she’d have been in bed and it’s horrible to think she may have died in a horrible way unable to contact me,I have a lot of friends at work of various ages and my work place was amazing at the time and H/O sent me a letter of condolences which was a nice touch,my manager was only young and when I broke down he took me to one side and said whatever you want or need just ask
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Hats off to you guys for being so open, people might be reading these posts and get the strength to help themselves.
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In reply to Post #34
Sorry for your loss mate I can only imagine how difficult it is to deal with
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In reply to Post #31
I lost my mom almost 2 years ago(December 2024)and I struggled so much with her loss as I was with her when she had a stroke and again when in ambulance waiting for a cubicle,I was with her when she passed away too,I was in a bad way for months with grief etc,I broke down at work a few times when I eventually returned and was on verge of sucide twice trying to cope with my loss,I have flash backs of her that night she had a stroke and in hospital seeing her lying there after passing away.
I tried to speak to people through my work app but felt they weren’t listening to what I wanted to say and eventually I got into my doctors after trying a few times and being ignored a few times,and I broke down they diagnosed depression due to not properly grieving for her,I tried to speak to my brothers about our loss but they deal with it differently to me,I miss her every single day and she as amazing and always asked if I caught and how big and if I hadn’t she’d say “never mind son always next time,I had to show her by moving her hands apart how big they was as she was blind and deaf,anyway the doctors prescribed me setraline I was wary of it and looked at the symptoms and spoke to people who had taken it and decided no I’m not taking tablets.
I grieve better now at my own pace and on my own away from people and if I catch a fish when I’m out fishing I like to think she’s looking down at me and saying well done son.
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In reply to Post #32
Matt have bought lots of you including the Harrisons
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In reply to Post #31
Exactly the same!
Karlos called me a "trader" on here, (in jest) but I used to have compulsive purchases, (not so much now but it does still happen) then either send them back or if it was too late to do that, flog them on at a loss.
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In reply to Post #27
Very interesting like Spod I was just put on sertraline with little thought when going through a rough time, the ADHD does make sense as I am very impulsive which I’m told is a symptom amongst other things. (I buy and sell my gear all the time, it’s beyond a joke now - cost me thousands! I’ve swapped between hearns and 10fts 3 times in the last 12 months buying new each time)
I’m sticking to it this time though, for now 🤣
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There’s a program on tonight channel 4 called the great ADHD myth 8pm
Could be an interesting watch
Chris packham (insert spit) did one a year or so ago that was a good watch
Helped me learn my grandsons diagnoses. That was from a sufferers perspective.
LINKY POO™ https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m002c6bb
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In reply to Post #28
It's helped me understand why I'm like it, the way I can be sat watching a film and all I can hear is the kids on their mobile phones in the kitchen or someone eating a packet of crisps 😂😂😂
Interestingly my stepdaughter who was diagnosed 98 percentile yesterday with ADHD cannot sit still around the house, take her fishing and she can stare at a float and not move for hours, also because she hyper focuses, she is excelling at rugby, having only played for 2 years is now training and playing with Gloucester at county level
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