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Joke Thread (2,781 posts / 660,094 views)
SlugHunter SlugHunter
Posts: 22,752
Post #757 24 Dec 2012 11:44
0
As we laid in bed I dipped my finger into the wife's fanny.

She got a bit upset and said can't you just lick your finger to turn the page.
sik sik
Posts: 2,391
Post #758 24 Dec 2012 11:45
0
I haven't washed my van for a few weeks now. I caught a tramp writing a message on it this morning.

It said, "I wish my wife was this clean
sik sik
Posts: 2,391
Post #759 24 Dec 2012 11:45
0
I have lost my phone, so if you find it I can explain the pictures.

I suspected my hamster had hypothermia so I needed to stick him somewhere warm, quickly
catfish1 catfish1
Posts: 1,629
Post #760 24 Dec 2012 13:06
0
In reply to Post #757
catfish1 catfish1
Posts: 1,629
Post #761 24 Dec 2012 13:13
0
What's the best way to kill a rapist?




Well according to Alex Ferguson....its tapping him on the head with a football.
SlugHunter SlugHunter
Posts: 22,752
Post #763 24 Dec 2012 14:00
0
In reply to Post #761
SlugHunter SlugHunter
Posts: 22,752
Post #764 24 Dec 2012 14:32
0
Paul Daniels has revealed that, 40 years ago he picked up a hitchhiker and kissed her intimately only to discover she was a schoolgirl. He has therefore escaped 4 decades of prison and a media hate campaign.

Now *that's* magic!!
sik sik
Posts: 2,391
Post #765 24 Dec 2012 15:35
0
In reply to Post #764
WaftyCranker WaftyCranker
Posts: 3,455
Post #766 24 Dec 2012 16:15
0
In reply to Post #764
WaftyCranker WaftyCranker
Posts: 3,455
Post #767 24 Dec 2012 16:18
0
I can't wait to unwrap and open 'Footballers' Cluedo' tomorrow.

I bet it was 'Ashley Williams' in 'The Liberty Stadium' with 'The Ball'.
SlugHunter SlugHunter
Posts: 22,752
Post #768 24 Dec 2012 17:03
0
In reply to Post #767
WaftyCranker WaftyCranker
Posts: 3,455
Post #769 24 Dec 2012 19:03
0
Breaking news; FA to introduce sponge footballs and safety helmets after van Persie near death experience.
WaftyCranker WaftyCranker
Posts: 3,455
Post #770 24 Dec 2012 20:36
0
What is white, the size of a smartie and can induce a cardiac arrest in a 74 year old man within one second?

Paul Daniels door bell
SlugHunter SlugHunter
Posts: 22,752
Post #771 24 Dec 2012 20:37
0
In reply to Post #770
sik sik
Posts: 2,391
Post #772 24 Dec 2012 21:35
0
In reply to Post #770
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