In reply to Post #13
Thanks for this mate, I’m deffo going to do this - will hopefully help the self doubt going forward.
It’s clear which the Spod tip is as it just rattles around on the normal rods - but my OCD brain won’t accept it - was still checking last night!!
Thanks for this mate, I’m deffo going to do this - will hopefully help the self doubt going forward.
It’s clear which the Spod tip is as it just rattles around on the normal rods - but my OCD brain won’t accept it - was still checking last night!!
Mental Health is such a tough one, especially for men - and I have lived over 36 years with the massive downs that it can bring. I had a shocking 6 months when 23 and lost my parents within 3 weeks - I could bore you with the details and often do with friends and random strangers, and almost feel that it was so shocking that it excuses my mental state - but in the last 10 years i have learnt and seen that you don’t need ‘scale’ for mental health, that my shocking events are no better or worse than the person that worries that the neighbour didn’t say good morning.
Depression is a hungry beast - it looks like everywhere for food and hen you start to go downhill it is fast and despite every best intention you keep digging. Mine will come again for sure - but each time I am better equipped than before. Talking definitely helps - but I would say that all of the good advice and chats I’ve had are from others who have their own problems - I have spoken to good mates who have no idea about 3am wide awake looking for things to get down about so whilst they sympathise you do need relatable reassurance sometimes.
My advice would be to try and understand the signs of going downhill, when you get hit by the first couple of rocks, it makes you more rational for the pebbles that will follow, write them down so that the 20 worries in your head suddenly become 3, the rest you have dreamt up or manipulated to feed the beast - suddenly you have the three biggies to concentrate on or rationalise.
Secondly - you won’t beat a hungry mind - so counting down the minutes from 3am to alarm clock is ridiculous- embrace this time, beat your wretched thoughts by reading, or doing something, until the beast gets bored and lets you rest.
For me (I can’t speak for others) there were some obvious reasons for the dips, a senior responsible job for me, it’s people piling on the pressure in exchange for more and more money. I was incredibly lucky in breaking that cycle and know that financially it is not an option, but looking back 8 years that was a life and death decision - I earn half my wage and love my job (most fays) if you can change your trigger this is obviously the single biggest thing to do - it can be as easy as accepting that ‘toxic’ friend can go f emself.
I’ve also found - if your down - don’t fish or do short days etc. I love the solitude of fishing so my mind would to do a number on me. For me fishing is like some drugs when you in a good mood it magnifies everything if you’re down that’s not where you want magnification.
Not an easy read but ‘the art of being disliked’ is an ok read and puts a lot into perspective (stay with it as the first half is monotonous priming) and also excercise I started running 5 years ago at 54 as I didn’t realise that playing football all my life wasn’t just fun but that 30 min runs really help my ongoing fight with the gremlins - I am nowhere near fit but the couch to 5k really helped and also I still to this day NEVER enjoy the run, but when it’s over that is such a high.
God that is long and boring, good luck all, happy to help anyone (except Brighton fans) in any way possible.
Depression is a hungry beast - it looks like everywhere for food and hen you start to go downhill it is fast and despite every best intention you keep digging. Mine will come again for sure - but each time I am better equipped than before. Talking definitely helps - but I would say that all of the good advice and chats I’ve had are from others who have their own problems - I have spoken to good mates who have no idea about 3am wide awake looking for things to get down about so whilst they sympathise you do need relatable reassurance sometimes.
My advice would be to try and understand the signs of going downhill, when you get hit by the first couple of rocks, it makes you more rational for the pebbles that will follow, write them down so that the 20 worries in your head suddenly become 3, the rest you have dreamt up or manipulated to feed the beast - suddenly you have the three biggies to concentrate on or rationalise.
Secondly - you won’t beat a hungry mind - so counting down the minutes from 3am to alarm clock is ridiculous- embrace this time, beat your wretched thoughts by reading, or doing something, until the beast gets bored and lets you rest.
For me (I can’t speak for others) there were some obvious reasons for the dips, a senior responsible job for me, it’s people piling on the pressure in exchange for more and more money. I was incredibly lucky in breaking that cycle and know that financially it is not an option, but looking back 8 years that was a life and death decision - I earn half my wage and love my job (most fays) if you can change your trigger this is obviously the single biggest thing to do - it can be as easy as accepting that ‘toxic’ friend can go f emself.
I’ve also found - if your down - don’t fish or do short days etc. I love the solitude of fishing so my mind would to do a number on me. For me fishing is like some drugs when you in a good mood it magnifies everything if you’re down that’s not where you want magnification.
Not an easy read but ‘the art of being disliked’ is an ok read and puts a lot into perspective (stay with it as the first half is monotonous priming) and also excercise I started running 5 years ago at 54 as I didn’t realise that playing football all my life wasn’t just fun but that 30 min runs really help my ongoing fight with the gremlins - I am nowhere near fit but the couch to 5k really helped and also I still to this day NEVER enjoy the run, but when it’s over that is such a high.
God that is long and boring, good luck all, happy to help anyone (except Brighton fans) in any way possible.
In reply to Post #17
Good read that mate, glad that you found running helps - your ok on the football I’m a Leeds fan 😂
Good read that mate, glad that you found running helps - your ok on the football I’m a Leeds fan 😂
In reply to Post #18
MOT
MOT
Have a look at;
LINKY POO™ https://andysmanclub.co.uk/
There will hopefully be a group in your area. I used to go and found it helpful. 👍
As for Sertraline it is a horrible drug, I had a reaction to it after a few months which raised my seratonin to abnormal levels and ended up in A&E with suspected, (and sometimes fatal) Seratonin Syndrome. Not something I would recommend! Some GP's will prescribe anti-depressants like smarties so make sure you fully understand the side effects and ask that they give you a full MOT at the same time as other ailments can have an effect, especially if they are unknown.
LINKY POO™ https://andysmanclub.co.uk/
There will hopefully be a group in your area. I used to go and found it helpful. 👍
As for Sertraline it is a horrible drug, I had a reaction to it after a few months which raised my seratonin to abnormal levels and ended up in A&E with suspected, (and sometimes fatal) Seratonin Syndrome. Not something I would recommend! Some GP's will prescribe anti-depressants like smarties so make sure you fully understand the side effects and ask that they give you a full MOT at the same time as other ailments can have an effect, especially if they are unknown.
In reply to Post #20
Cheers for the link mate will check it out, agree on the sertraline - wasn’t keen on it myself for different reasons, glad you are ok after having it 👍
Cheers for the link mate will check it out, agree on the sertraline - wasn’t keen on it myself for different reasons, glad you are ok after having it 👍
In reply to Post #20
Nice one Matt
Please can someone create a link for this dinosaur.
https://www.eput.nhs.uk/news/icarps-fishing-therapy-for-ptsd-and-depression-nominated-for-national-mental-health-award/
Above is an amazing project that is part of the trust I work for.
Please have a read.
Nice one Matt
Please can someone create a link for this dinosaur.
https://www.eput.nhs.uk/news/icarps-fishing-therapy-for-ptsd-and-depression-nominated-for-national-mental-health-award/
Above is an amazing project that is part of the trust I work for.
Please have a read.
In reply to Post #23
LINKY POO™ https://www.eput.nhs.uk/news/icarps-fishing-therapy-for-ptsd-and-depression-nominated-for-national-mental-health-award/
👍
LINKY POO™ https://www.eput.nhs.uk/news/icarps-fishing-therapy-for-ptsd-and-depression-nominated-for-national-mental-health-award/
👍
In reply to Post #24
Cheers promise I’m going to learn 👍
Cheers promise I’m going to learn 👍
In reply to Post #23
Cheers for that, will take a look later 👍
Cheers for that, will take a look later 👍
In reply to Post #1
Just under 2 Xmas's ago my new wife told me I had to go the doctors or I wouldn't make it to my 50th.
Had a long chat with the doctor who asked me if I had to work as much as I did, I run my own business and decided to walk away from a very large but incredibly stressful contract. I came off all medication for depression which I'd been on for 10 years..
This is where it became interesting, I put myself on a CBT course, my step daughter was referred for ADHD.
I stepped back from work for a few months, I appreciate not many people can do that.
What I learnt on that CBT course is I've not been depressed for a long time, I suffer from anxiety, which is a completely different beast and explains exactly how you're feeling but anxiety and depression don't always come hand in hand so maybe worth speaking to your Dr.
I've also discovered on the on the ADHD spectrum recently, I go down rabbit holes, most recent example I took on Abarth over noise emissions on my new car and learnt all about power to mass ratios and noise emission tolerances under un guidelines with the phase 3 of noise emissions.
It's actually quite cool because I focus,I smash everything out by 2pm then I get a couple of hours quiet before the kids come home lol
Just under 2 Xmas's ago my new wife told me I had to go the doctors or I wouldn't make it to my 50th.
Had a long chat with the doctor who asked me if I had to work as much as I did, I run my own business and decided to walk away from a very large but incredibly stressful contract. I came off all medication for depression which I'd been on for 10 years..
This is where it became interesting, I put myself on a CBT course, my step daughter was referred for ADHD.
I stepped back from work for a few months, I appreciate not many people can do that.
What I learnt on that CBT course is I've not been depressed for a long time, I suffer from anxiety, which is a completely different beast and explains exactly how you're feeling but anxiety and depression don't always come hand in hand so maybe worth speaking to your Dr.
I've also discovered on the on the ADHD spectrum recently, I go down rabbit holes, most recent example I took on Abarth over noise emissions on my new car and learnt all about power to mass ratios and noise emission tolerances under un guidelines with the phase 3 of noise emissions.
It's actually quite cool because I focus,I smash everything out by 2pm then I get a couple of hours quiet before the kids come home lol
In reply to Post #27
Interesting read mate.👍
I have been looking into ADHD recently and you are right, a lot gets put down to depression when the person isn't actually depressed, they have Anxiety and/or ADHD but the two often co-exist.
People generally associate ADHD with hyperactive kids but it has many different forms and although you may have had ADHD your entire life, (and never known about it) it can surface in a lot of adult behaviours such as overthinking, disasterising, compulsiveness, irritability, lack of focus, addictive behaviour, fatigue etc.
I saw a Psychotherapist earlier this year after my "scare" whilst on Sertraline and he pretty much confirmed the same for me, I wasn't depressed therefore should never have been prescribed anti-depressants. I am not on any drugs at all now, instead trying to lead a more "healthy" lifestyle, no caffeine, limited processed foods, exercise, yoga/relaxation, limited alcohol etc. He did say that if I needed medication in the future he would go down the route of mood stabilisers, although he said I fell well short of the Bipolar spectrum.
It is a fascinating subject but also bloody scary!
Interesting read mate.👍
I have been looking into ADHD recently and you are right, a lot gets put down to depression when the person isn't actually depressed, they have Anxiety and/or ADHD but the two often co-exist.
People generally associate ADHD with hyperactive kids but it has many different forms and although you may have had ADHD your entire life, (and never known about it) it can surface in a lot of adult behaviours such as overthinking, disasterising, compulsiveness, irritability, lack of focus, addictive behaviour, fatigue etc.
I saw a Psychotherapist earlier this year after my "scare" whilst on Sertraline and he pretty much confirmed the same for me, I wasn't depressed therefore should never have been prescribed anti-depressants. I am not on any drugs at all now, instead trying to lead a more "healthy" lifestyle, no caffeine, limited processed foods, exercise, yoga/relaxation, limited alcohol etc. He did say that if I needed medication in the future he would go down the route of mood stabilisers, although he said I fell well short of the Bipolar spectrum.
It is a fascinating subject but also bloody scary!
In reply to Post #28
It's helped me understand why I'm like it, the way I can be sat watching a film and all I can hear is the kids on their mobile phones in the kitchen or someone eating a packet of crisps 😂😂😂
Interestingly my stepdaughter who was diagnosed 98 percentile yesterday with ADHD cannot sit still around the house, take her fishing and she can stare at a float and not move for hours, also because she hyper focuses, she is excelling at rugby, having only played for 2 years is now training and playing with Gloucester at county level
It's helped me understand why I'm like it, the way I can be sat watching a film and all I can hear is the kids on their mobile phones in the kitchen or someone eating a packet of crisps 😂😂😂
Interestingly my stepdaughter who was diagnosed 98 percentile yesterday with ADHD cannot sit still around the house, take her fishing and she can stare at a float and not move for hours, also because she hyper focuses, she is excelling at rugby, having only played for 2 years is now training and playing with Gloucester at county level
There’s a program on tonight channel 4 called the great ADHD myth 8pm
Could be an interesting watch
Chris packham (insert spit) did one a year or so ago that was a good watch
Helped me learn my grandsons diagnoses. That was from a sufferers perspective.
LINKY POO™ https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m002c6bb
Could be an interesting watch
Chris packham (insert spit) did one a year or so ago that was a good watch
Helped me learn my grandsons diagnoses. That was from a sufferers perspective.
LINKY POO™ https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m002c6bb
In reply to Post #27
Very interesting like Spod I was just put on sertraline with little thought when going through a rough time, the ADHD does make sense as I am very impulsive which I’m told is a symptom amongst other things. (I buy and sell my gear all the time, it’s beyond a joke now - cost me thousands! I’ve swapped between hearns and 10fts 3 times in the last 12 months buying new each time)
I’m sticking to it this time though, for now 🤣
Very interesting like Spod I was just put on sertraline with little thought when going through a rough time, the ADHD does make sense as I am very impulsive which I’m told is a symptom amongst other things. (I buy and sell my gear all the time, it’s beyond a joke now - cost me thousands! I’ve swapped between hearns and 10fts 3 times in the last 12 months buying new each time)
I’m sticking to it this time though, for now 🤣