Brown smoke is coming from my arse.

The new Plop has arrived.

How do you know when your girlfriend is on anabolic steroids?

When she flips you over, holds you down and fukcs you ..up the arse with her clitoris.

One afternoon a man says to his wife, you, me and the dogs are going pig shooting. They pack the truck and head off. They get there late at night and the man says, we will head off at sunrise. The wife is tired and replies, I don't want to go in the morning. The husband is furious and replies, I will give you 3 options, you, me and the dog shoot, or you give me a blow job or we have @nal sex. The wife isn't to pleased but realizes it's one or the other. They rise early in the morning and the husband says well, what's it to be. She isn't pleased but decides to give him a blow job. As soon as she starts she stops and says, your d1ck tastes like sh1t. He replies: "Yeh, the dog didn't want to go either

White smoke from the Vatican, That can only meen one thing;

They've finally finished burning all the laptops and hard drives.

In reply to Post #1317

In reply to Post #1317

In reply to Post #1317

One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.

Pretty Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"

The man replied, "Yep, sure do."

Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"

"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.

Perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"

The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years.

One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.

Pretty Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"

The man replied, "Yep, sure do."

Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"

"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.

Perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"

The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years.

"Don't forget it's Steak and Blowjob Day today!" I said to the wife before I left work.

"That's not fair," she moaned. "What do I get out of all this? "....

"A trip to the butchers and a protein shake!"

A welsh farmer was f--king his prize ewe when his sheepdog came over and started licking his ---hole.
Although it helped him come quicker,he couldn't help but think-dogs are dirty b.....ds!.

In reply to Post #1324

In reply to Post #1324

Last night I was talking to a young, good looking woman. She asked me if I like breasts or legs. I told her what I really liked, was a nice shaved snatch.

Apparently I'm not welcome in KFC anymore.

In reply to Post #1327
love it