so the media say playing grand theft auto 5 will cause players to commit crime.
Bull**** i have got the coronation street board game and i am not a paedophile.
Bull**** i have got the coronation street board game and i am not a paedophile.
As a young boy i was blessed with a nine and three quarter inch penis.
Unfortunately it belonged to Father O'Malley.
Unfortunately it belonged to Father O'Malley.
I was sitting at a red stop light yesterday, minding my own business, patiently waiting for it to turn green even though there was no on-coming traffic.
A carload of bearded, loud, young Muslims, shouting anti-English slogans, with a half- burned Union Jack duck-taped to the boot lid of their car and a "Remember 9-11" slogan, spray painted on the side, was stopped next to me.
Suddenly they yelled, "Allah Akhbar !!" and took off before the light changed.
Out of nowhere a bus came speeding through the junction and ran directly over their car, crushing it completely and killing everyone in it.
For several minutes I sat in my car thinking to myself, "My God, that could have been me!!!"
So today, I went out and got myself a job as a bus driver!
A carload of bearded, loud, young Muslims, shouting anti-English slogans, with a half- burned Union Jack duck-taped to the boot lid of their car and a "Remember 9-11" slogan, spray painted on the side, was stopped next to me.
Suddenly they yelled, "Allah Akhbar !!" and took off before the light changed.
Out of nowhere a bus came speeding through the junction and ran directly over their car, crushing it completely and killing everyone in it.
For several minutes I sat in my car thinking to myself, "My God, that could have been me!!!"
So today, I went out and got myself a job as a bus driver!
Two female teachers took a group of students from grades 1, 2 and 3 for a field trip to Flemington Racecourse.
When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.
The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's toilet when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal. Having no choice, she went inside, helped the little boys with their pants, and began hoisting them up one by one, holding on to their willy's to direct the flow away from their clothes, and then shake them dry.
As she lifted one boy up, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring at his equipment the teacher said, 'You must be in Grade 3?
'No ma'am', he replied. 'I'm riding Black Caviar in the next race, but I really appreciate your help.'
When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.
The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's toilet when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal. Having no choice, she went inside, helped the little boys with their pants, and began hoisting them up one by one, holding on to their willy's to direct the flow away from their clothes, and then shake them dry.
As she lifted one boy up, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring at his equipment the teacher said, 'You must be in Grade 3?
'No ma'am', he replied. 'I'm riding Black Caviar in the next race, but I really appreciate your help.'
In reply to Post #1991
In reply to Post #1993
Can you believe it ?
My Income Tax return form as been sent back to me because in response to the question 4
Do you have anyone dependent on you ? I replied
2.1 million illegal immigrants, 1.1 million crack heads, 4.4 million unemployed Jeremy Kyle scroungers
900,000 prisoners over 95 prisons plus 650 idiots in Parliament and the whole of the European Commission.
They claimed this was an unacceptable answer
So who the hell have I missed out.
Can you believe it ?
My Income Tax return form as been sent back to me because in response to the question 4
Do you have anyone dependent on you ? I replied
2.1 million illegal immigrants, 1.1 million crack heads, 4.4 million unemployed Jeremy Kyle scroungers
900,000 prisoners over 95 prisons plus 650 idiots in Parliament and the whole of the European Commission.
They claimed this was an unacceptable answer
So who the hell have I missed out.
Silently i slipped the condom over my erect dick and rolled it down the entire length of my throbbing shaft,never once losing eye contact with the young woman as she stared at me in wide eyed ,jaw dropping disbelief.....Then breaking the silence i spoke........"Yes,that seems to fit alright,i'll take the whole packet please......."
paddy sees Murphy in hospital with two bandaged feet.Paddy asks "what have you done? Murphy replies"its f**king Morrisons again!!! I bought a sponge pudding for my tea and it said pierce the tin and stand in boiling water for ten minutes.
The missus wants something in silk for christmas......No doubt this tin of emulsion will be the wrong colour.
Am visiting my sick Uncle in hospital,he's in the morgue,having a ****
In reply to Post #1998
My son asked me how babies are made.I had no idea how to approach it so I looked online and found a video that explains it all.
At the end of the video I told him "it's basically just like that,only the white stuff on her face should have gone up her fanny,and normally there isn't a horse involved".
My son asked me how babies are made.I had no idea how to approach it so I looked online and found a video that explains it all.
At the end of the video I told him "it's basically just like that,only the white stuff on her face should have gone up her fanny,and normally there isn't a horse involved".
In reply to Post #1999
cracker
cracker
The new royal baby,George has already done 3 things off every mans bucket list.
1.become a billionaire
2.met the Queen.
3. Sucked Kate Middletons Tits
1.become a billionaire
2.met the Queen.
3. Sucked Kate Middletons Tits
I bought the wife some crutch less knickers for Halloween.not for sexual purposes but so that she has a better grip on her broomstick!