We have removed the last Joke thread due to the content i.e. Racist and offensive jokes/comments.

Please do not post any jokes or comments that are racist or that are likely to cause offense.

Anyone posting racist or highly offensive 'jokes/comments' will be banned from the forum.

In reply to Post #1
An old lady at the park said to me today, "I see your dog's fetching balls."

I said, "I know he has but at your age you shouldn't really be looking."

In reply to Post #2
this thread is a joke

I've been trying to flush a Flump down the toilet for 3 days now..'it's just taking the piss'

In reply to Post #3
It is now

looks like this threads been ruined now,only decent thing on the forum

In reply to Post #6
why? it was only the funny jokes that made the other thread what it was.
it didn't need the racist or offensive jokes to get a laugh, the vast majority of jokes on there had me pissing myself!

In reply to Post #7

The wife was trying to be sexy for me last night. When I came up the stairs, I found her lying on the bed licking a lollipop. She then slipped it up her snatch and gave it another lick. I said "careful with that, love. You need it to see the children across the road tomorrow."

I was thinking of starting up a small zoo, so I wrote a letter to London Zoo;

“Dear Sir, I'm starting up a zoo, please send me 2 mongooses.”

I thought that didn't sound right so I tried again;

“Dear Sir, I'm starting up a small zoo, please send me 2 mongeese.”

Nope, that still didn't sound right;

“Dear Sir, I'm starting up a small zoo, please send me 2 mongi.”

Ahh **** it I thought;

“Dear Sir, I'm starting up a small zoo, please send me a mongoose.

P.S. Send me another one.”

In reply to Post #10
hi guys,
i'am at A & E
Just a quick word of warning...........

the Dyson ball cleaner is not what you think it is!!!!!!

A guy in cricket whites staggers into A & E with his hand thrust between his legs
whatever happened to you asks the triage nurse as she leads him into a cubicle
hit with a cricket ball says the guy
drop your trousers and jump up onto the bed says the nurse as she goes to fetch the soothing cream
hows that says the nurse as she smothers his knob and goolies in cream
fantastic says the guy but my thumbs still killing me

In reply to Post #7
didnt mean the racist ones just that nowadays things most people find funny theres always some1 whos offended by something thats just a joke 2 most people

I did not believe it when my mum told me Davey Jones had died.

Then I saw her face, now I'm a believer

In reply to Post #13
its not a matter of whether anyones offended by it, its up there under Rules/Usage as a forum rule...........