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   Old Thread  #375 28 Sept 2012 at 11.09pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1
Hi, I'm hosting a charity disco and raffle night on the 6th October, to raise money for people who struggle to reach orgasm.

If you can't come then let me know.
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   Old Thread  #374 28 Sept 2012 at 12.43pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
I don't like to blow my own trumpet...but I just can't help myself since I had my bottom ribs removed.
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   Old Thread  #373 28 Sept 2012 at 12.35pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Sky Sports News Latest - The next 4 weekends of Premier League football are under threat as footballers struck down by a severe outbreak of diarrhoea.

They are all shi**ing themselves over John Terry's whereabouts during his 4 match ban.
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   Old Thread  #372 27 Sept 2012 at 3.52pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Well, whilst JT now has 4 games to sit out of he's probably gonna be bored....... If I was a Chelsea player i'd be making sure my wife/girlfriend goes overboard on the sunbeds and fake tan, he's less likely to be interested then
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   Old Thread  #371 26 Sept 2012 at 6.55pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #369
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   Old Thread  #370 26 Sept 2012 at 4.26pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #369 26 Sept 2012 at 4.09pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
A fireman is at the station house working outside on the fire truck when he notices a little girl next door. The little girl is in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the side.

She is wearing a fireman's hat and has the wagon tied to a dog. The fireman says "Hey little girl. What are you doing?" The little girl says "I'm pretending to be a fireman and this is my fire truck!"

The fireman walks over to take a closer look. "Little girl that sure is a nice fire truck!" the fireman says. "Thanks mister", says the little girl. The fireman looks a little closer and notices the little girl has tied the dog to the wagon by it's testicles.

"Little girl", says the fireman, "I don't want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the dog's neck I think you could go faster."

The little girl says, "You're probably right mister, but then I wouldn't have a siren!"
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   Old Thread  #368 24 Sept 2012 at 6.15pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #367 23 Sept 2012 at 7.01pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
For some reeson,
I've never yet won a gaim of skrabel.
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   Old Thread  #366 23 Sept 2012 at 7.51am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
I got a rash after tipping a can of lager into my wife's fanny and then lapping it out.
The doctor's advised me against ***** drinking.
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   Old Thread  #365 22 Sept 2012 at 11.07pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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i wouldnt think her fannys that tight
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   Old Thread  #364 21 Sept 2012 at 8.47pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
After sha**ing Cheryl Cole yesterday, I think there are two things you should know..
First, her fanny is tight as f**k, a real struggle to get in.
Second the staff at Madame Tussauds are miserable f**kers with no sense of humour.
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   Old Thread  #363 21 Sept 2012 at 8.44pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Whilst sha**ing my wife last night, I huffed, rolled off and said, "It's like f**king an inflatable sex doll."She looked at me completely shocked.
"You're not helping yourself here." I said.
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   Old Thread  #362 20 Sept 2012 at 7.17pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Women are the only creatures to defy the laws of gravity.The heavier they are, the easier they are to pick up
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   Old Thread  #361 19 Sept 2012 at 9.58pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1
I came home to find my Thai wife shagging the postman.

He was bent over the kitchen table with the tears streaming down his cheeks.
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