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   Old Thread  #594 22 Nov 2012 at 1.41pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
My Chinese mate had a girlfriend named Lorraine.But he was cheating on her with another girl called Claire Lee
Unfortunately Lorraine died.At her funeral he stood up and sang."I can see Claire Lee now Lorraine has gone.
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   Old Thread  #593 22 Nov 2012 at 1.38pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
My girlfriend walked in last night to see me sitting on the sofa, arms crossed.

"What's wrong with you?" she asked.

I said, "Have you seen the size of that **** you left down the toilet?"

"Sorry, I forgot to flush," she replied. "Is it big?"

"Yes, it's twice the size of my penis!" I said. "I've been asking you for anal for months!"
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   Old Thread  #592 22 Nov 2012 at 1.36pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
When i heard Stephen Hawking had reached 70,I thought,F--k me that's one powerful wheelchair....!!
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   Old Thread  #591 22 Nov 2012 at 1.33pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Experts have predicted that by 2025 you will be no more than six feet away from an ex Chelsea manager.
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   Old Thread  #590 22 Nov 2012 at 1.31pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #589 22 Nov 2012 at 3.54am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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I saw a dyslexic Yorkshireman wearing a cat flap.
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   Old Thread  #588 21 Nov 2012 at 9.35pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #587 21 Nov 2012 at 12.39pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Paddy walks into the doctors straight in to the doctors room and boots him right in the knackers and says "thats for telling my wife she's got a nice F@nny"" i told her she had Acute Angina " the doctor replied
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   Old Thread  #586 21 Nov 2012 at 6.20am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
I walked into WH Smiths and asked "do you have that new self help book for men with small cocks?"Girl says "I don't think its in yet."I said"yeah that's the one.
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   Old Thread  #585 20 Nov 2012 at 7.28pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #584 20 Nov 2012 at 7.23pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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Some goodens their mate
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   Old Thread  #583 20 Nov 2012 at 10.00am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #582 20 Nov 2012 at 9.59am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #581 20 Nov 2012 at 3.31am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Sat opposite an Indian lady on the train today, she shut her eyes and stopped breathing. I thought she was dead, until I saw the red spot on her forehead and realised she was just on standby
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   Old Thread  #580 20 Nov 2012 at 3.31am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Paddy says, "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador . ”Bugger that!" says Mick. "Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?
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