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Just been recommended the Adam Ant diet.....
‘Don't chew ever, don't chew ever'.
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In reply to Post #2630
People are always asking what will you be doing next year....
How do I know it's not as if I have 2020 vision
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Special thanks to my neighbour who lent me some sheeting to put on the windscreen during this freezing weather.
Ta Pauline.
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What do you call a french man wearing open toe shoes?
Felipe Falope!
Happy Brexit, whoops....Happy New Year!
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In reply to Post #2627
What is a chickens favourite footwear?
Reebok, bok, bok, bokarrr
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In reply to Post #2626
Indeed you do.
Happy Xmas mate.
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In reply to Post #2625
You have to laugh, all in a night out 
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In reply to Post #2624
What a lad.
My mate took the bus from the bus station, dropped the lads off at twigg street and as they were getting off asked them for the fare.,...
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In reply to Post #2623
No, different initials. Quite a few years ago now. Its the same lad who drive a JCB on a night out through a supermarket window of a “southern holiday” resort. Quite a character, got sent down 
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In reply to Post #2622
Stranglely enough my mate did the same....
Not the same mate is it, couldn't be, surely?.
Initials of my mate who did that........C.B
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In reply to Post #2619
Good un that 
Reminds me of a lad I know who once pinched a coach and did the same, took all his mates home
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In reply to Post #2619
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Skeleton goes into a bar, orders a pint of lager and a mop.
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In reply to Post #2618
A warning to all be careful about drink driving as we are getting close to Christmas and Police are out there checking on people.
Last night I was out for a few drinks. One thing lead to another and I had a few too many beers and then went onto the shots Not a good idea. Knowing I was over the limit, I decided to leave my van at the pub and took a taxi home. Sure enough, I passed a police checkpoint where they were pulling over drivers and performing breathalyser tests. Because I was in a taxi they just waved it past.
I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise as I've never driven a taxi before and I am not even sure where I got it from..
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Went to the doctors the other day , he told me to take up a hobby that gets me out of the pub ,
So I started smoking again
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